After 58 years of marriage, my husband Walter remembered football statistics better than our wedding anniversary.
When I reminded him what day it was, he barely seemed concerned.
So I gave him an ultimatum.
“By tomorrow, I want something that goes from zero to 180 in five seconds, or I’m divorcing you!”
The next morning, two delivery trucks arrived, leaving a giant box in our yard.
Walter proudly told me to open my present.
Inside were several smaller boxes. Finally, I reached the last one.
It contained a bathroom scale.
“Zero to 180 in five seconds!” he announced, explaining that someone stepping on it would make the numbers jump.
Our neighbors burst out laughing.
I decided Walter deserved a little revenge.
At a charity auction that weekend, I arranged for him to be introduced as a vintage gentleman, 82 years old, with 58 years of previous ownership.
The audience loved it.
Then the bidding began.
A mysterious silver-haired woman started raising her offers, and I became determined not to let her walk away with my husband.
The price climbed higher and higher until I finally won him for $800!
But just when I thought I’d taught Walter a lesson, the woman revealed the truth.
Walter had secretly asked her to help turn my prank against me. He wanted to see how far I’d go to win him back.
And the best part? The charity received the entire $800.
On the drive home, Walter asked if I was still glad I’d bought him.
I smiled and said, “Ask me after you’ve done the dishes.”
He had forgotten our anniversary, but he certainly hadn’t forgotten how to make me laugh.