My husband and I usually give our grandkids a small registry gift and a $40,000 check before their wedding, asking them to keep it private.
When our youngest granddaughter, Eloise, received an air fryer (the cheapest item on her registry), she angrily called us “cheap.” Hurt by her disrespect, we told her about the planned cash gift—but she didn’t listen and continued accusing us of not caring.
We later gave her another gift but decided not to give the $40,000 due to her behavior.
After learning the truth from relatives, Eloise demanded the money, saying it was unfair. We explained it wasn’t about the gift—it was about her disrespect. She apologized but also made excuses and continued pressuring us.
Now she’s boycotting Christmas, and her mother sides with her. Despite this, we stand by our decision, believing love and respect matter more than money, and hope she eventually understands.